As with most job application stories, this one began with an attractive job ad. I found it on a popular online jobs platform. Let’s call the worst client I never had “Dee”.

Dee is the sole owner of a small British publishing company selling books on Amazon, using Amazon KDP, otherwise known as Kindle. When Dee put out an ad on the job platform, it was for a Junior English Writer. In this ad, he specified he wanted a “super capable” Virtual Assistant. He also wanted someone with an advanced degree.

Of course, I applied. Writer? I was at that time hell-bent on being a Certified True & Authentic Writer working for an International Publishing Company. I was also proud of my advanced degree in psychology, but I had very low regard of my abilities.

Applying for this position, I thought that if I got it, it would be paradise.

It was only later that I realized I walked into a landmine, not a goldmine.

You see, Dee was very manipulative, self-centered, and uncaring. He didn’t give a sh*t about me, his only concern was his business.

I’m perfectly aware that his attitude toward me is the norm. After all, as far as clients go, they don’t post ads on the aforementioned platform to look for long-term collaborators. Most of them are looking for cheap Filipino labor.

But Dee’s behavior was at best neglectful and at worst predatory. Among all the potential clients I came into contact with, his behavior was the worse.

I need to relive my horrible experience because if I don’t write about it, I won’t get past it. This story is also a cautionary tale for jobseekers like me. It’s especially relevant if you are applying for an online job as a freelancer.

Moth to a flame

When Dee first contacted me, he was insistent that we use WhatsApp. I don’t use it often, so I had to re-install the app. As soon as I did, we got on a call and spent thirty minutes talking about his business. He also dropped hints about what he wanted me to do. The night I got the call, I couldn’t sleep. My hopes were jacked up high.

Look at it from my perspective: I am an unknown writer from the Philippines, and a British publisher is interested in working with me.

And then the days dragged on. I keep on checking WhatsApp. No messages.

One week passed. Still nothing.

I did what any sensible jobseeker did: I sent one message to follow up on WhatsApp and one email, just to be sure. Any more follow-ups and I risked the chance of being too spammy, too needy.

I waited, and he replied.

The first trap

“I want you to do a trial task, to make sure you are a good fit for the business. Edit this manuscript and send it back as soon as possible.”

He sent me a 30,000-word document to edit and add subtitles to. My task was to fact-check, grammar-check, and do necessary edits so that the manuscript was acceptable as an e-book on Kindle.

 Dee did not offer me pay for this trial task, but I said, “yes”.

In hindsight, I should have listened to my intuition. It was yelling loudly, “no”. But I forged on anyway.

I did the sensible thing: I edited very lightly, spending only half a day on the trial task.

I emailed the manuscript back, expecting a prompt-ish reply.

But none came—I waited one week, but there was nothing in WhatsApp, and no email either. I felt like I had to do another follow-up.

The second trap

Which leads us to the second trap.

When Dee answered my follow-up question, “How did I fare?” It was with a short, “Sorry, not good.” But at this point, I had the tenacity to ask for another shot at the editing. And so he responded with another call.

Dee explained during this eventful call that I did so bad a job that it didn’t befit my title as a master’s degree holder. He told me to redo the editing. And fool that I am, I took a day off work to go through the manuscript line by line. I gave it my everything; no hold barred.

It was during this call that I heard what I wanted most hear: that I am a highly skilled person, a cut above the rest, a rare find amongst all the jobseekers in Onlinejobs.ph. I wanted to feel special, I guess.

But I will only be special and worthy if I passed his standards.

I craved deeply for his approval of me as a valid person. His approval meant that I am a real, legit writer.

And how did I do with my second chance at editing?

I failed, I guess.

I said, “I guess” because he gave me the silent treatment again.

At this moment, my suspicion that I was duped got greater.

I edited a full book for FREE.

Do I even remotely possess any self-respect? I must be so low to be groveling for this position.

It was at this point that I began actively colluding with the enemy.

In hindsight, I can see now how I contributed to this awful event. I had a part to play. But still…

Yes, there was a third trap

When I was ghosted after sending the revised manuscript I worked so hard for, I felt awful. I felt duped. For one week, I moped. I told myself I will not let Dee take advantage of me again. But there was something in me that wouldn’t let go. I needed closure. So, I sent another WhatsApp message to him, asking again for an update on my application.

This time, Dee replied with a vague, “I don’t know where to put you in the business. Maybe I give you another test to showcase your skills?” He gave me another test, then. “Write a 2000-word blog article about any self-help topic.”

You must be wondering why I agreed to this torture. Wasn’t I duped enough? This was going to be the third instance!

Well, this is how I rationalized it: I have already written a test article for another job opening. This test article or another company covered a self-help topic too. All I needed to do was edit some bits. I was recycling one audition for another, basically.

So, I edited and I polished. Then I sent it to Dee’s way. And after that? Dee was silent yet again. This time, my suspicion was confirmed: Dee is a scammer. I should just let this whole thing go. I’m not going to get the UK publisher job.

The Last Hurrah

A month passed.

Eventually, I got another job, incidentally from another small UK-based publisher. The Dee Affair seemed to be a thing of the past.

But then, this guy made one last appearance.

We don’t mean to be mean to other people, but we hurt them anyway.

In hindsight, my low self-worth caused me to fall into this particular trap. I was so eager to prove myself legit that I clubbed myself to death. Right now, I’ve begun a self-love journey. I’m still taking the first tentative steps, and sometimes, I still don’t like who I see in the mirror. But I persist.

If I had a bit more self-respect back then, I would have dropped him like a hot potato right from the start. I would not have been so gullible.

But still, he was mean. He used emotional manipulation to do things for him, and because I’m learning healthy boundaries, I don’t tolerate that anymore.

Melany hits back

To get back at all those times he ignored my existence, I did one act of retaliation, though.

I was already accepted by the other client when Dee contacted me for the last time—he wanted to talk again. This time, he said, he wanted to speed up to process of my onboarding.

But in this last instance, I knew how much he bullsh*ts. So, I indulged his request for a call. This last encounter of ours, like the first interview, was long-winded and subtitled All About Dee. The topics covered? How it would profit him if I write two books a month for him. How I needed to be at his beck and call…and all that for a VERY low-ball offer. Afterall, I wanted to prove myself, right?

I ended this call by telling him I did not promise to be his writer. I said I was choosing among other clients who had better offers. I hinted that his pay is indeed very, very low.

A few days later, I told him I don’t want to work for him.

I let him wait.

I hope I made him squirm (for a change).

Yeah, this time I was the one who rejected him, and it felt good.

For his reply, he sent me a demeaning message, as is typical for him.

He also flipped the narrative and said I was the one who asked for that last interview.

Promptly, I went to WhatsApp and blocked him. I blocked his Gmail too.

Serves him right. I deserve better. Definitely much better.

I am not absconding from my responsibility for the whole situation. But I am not solely the one to blame.

If only I listened to the screams of my intuition right from the start…

But then, regrets always come later.