You are never too old to learn something new. I am turning 40 next year. Exactly 11 months from now, I will be officially be in midlife. Forty. Such a big, significant number. And I’ve got nothing to show for. Errr. Not really. I have two lovely kids, RH (age 10) and AG (age 6). They are 100% breastfed, 100% Cared for with No Nanny Involvement and they are doing well. Apart from that, I survived a mental mental breakdown, and passed the licensure exam for Psychologists on my first try.
So, now what?
AG entered Grade One this June. RH is in Grade Five. When this happened, I suddenly have six hours of FREE time. Yes, FREE TIME. And you know what I want to do with my free time? I WANT A JOB. I want to be effective and appreciated outside of my life as mom. (The Psychologist gig is not generating enough income. A lot of attention, but not enough income).
Specifically, I want an on-line job. Because I have to be home and Mommy mode by the time AG and RH come home. I can’t exactly leave the house, go to an eight hour shift and commute back home, right? I am still running the household.
Following logic like most people do, I searched for a job online. After a month of searching….NO JOB. I had two interviews and countless numbers of proposals, but, NO JOB. At the end of my wits, I decided to do something else.
I walked into KMA Martial Arts. At 39, I decided to begin my training in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu (BJJ). What the hell? I’ve got nothing to lose.
But you ask, for real? What does that have BJJ have to do with job hunting?
Backstory: My son was being bullied in school. My husband and I made a joint decision to enroll him in Martial Arts (more about that later).
I was down in the dumps on training day Sunday, and I was watching my son on the mat. I was feeling ineffective, stupid and outdated. He was getting better in his technique. At that time, he had been training for a few months. He was crying less, complaining less. I noticed that his technique was improving.
At that moment, I realized,
“Hmmm, BJJ works with self-confidence.”
“Hmmm. Why don’t I give it a try?”
And further,
“If I do BJJ he can have a built-in sparring partner!”
And lastly,
“I feel so bad not getting any job offers, I want to get the crap beaten up out of me.” (After all, I am an Anorexic, and we are such sadomasochists.)
And so my BJJ life began.
This is KMA.
They have mixed BJJ classes (meaning kids and adults are in the same class) on Sunday afternoons. Because of the distance from our home, we can only practice once a week, on Sunday afternoons. But they do have weekday and Saturday classes for beginners and practitioners of all levels.
This is where I get myself smashed every Sunday. With kids as young as five.
Many, many times, I get smashed by kids as young as five.
And you know what, it’s humbling, it’s exhausting, and it’s a terrific learning experience.
I think I was in a rear naked choke when I realized,
“Well…that’s what job hunting feels like. Especially when you get a polite letter and you are wondering…”
I was being armbarred by an ten year-old-Orange-Belt when I realized…
I do not have to cry. I just have to tap and reset.
Tap. Reset. Do not cry. And move on to the next job application.
Tap. Reset. Move on. To the next application.
I have applied to 50 or so jobs since then.
Yesterday, I finally got fed up being rejected by Upwork. I tapped other resources, that online friends. Mary Jane B., one of my classmates in FVA, gave me an Upwork hack. In a matter of minutes, after following the hack she gave me, I got my Upwork Profile approved.
I found myself rolling over in happiness.
In BJJ, when you get stuck in a position where you are the Submittee (vs the Submitter), the strategy is to roll. Roll away. I guess I did that with the job application. I rolled with it. I did not let it get me down. It was just part of the experience.
The failure, the pain, being submitted and choked.
I was just part of the process.
We all get submitted: sweaty armpits, panting breaths, humiliation, tears and all.
When you lose, you just have to get better with your technique. After all, there are no losers, only learners. Both in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu and job hunting.
If you want to end my misery in job hunting, hire means your freelance writer! I can write articles like this for you. Click on my social media sites below. You can also contact me through this website. Drop a comment at the end of this blog.
If you want to get beaten up for fun, practice Brazilian Jiu Jitsu! Contact KMA through their direct phone number 02-5514449. Or through their Facebook Page . The head coach is Stephen Kamphius, if you are training with kids, you train with Coach Tony and his assistant Coach Lady.
